Male VS Female Cat/Kitten: Which Gender Should You Adopt?

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Boy or girl kitten? Male VS female cat? Does it even matter in the long run in terms of adopting a cat? Many think all cats will act pretty similar to each other, but gender plays a large role in many parts of your cat’s personality and their future behaviors. Thus, depending on the type of person you are, picking the right cat that fits with your own lifestyle is important to ensure the best experience for your cat butlership journey.

male vs female cat featured image.
Male or female cat?

Use the information provided as more of a reference point. There will be exceptions and deviations depending on the cat’s environment, health, and the way they were socialized. Additionally, I have always said that the best way to get to know a cat before they come into your apartment or home is to visit them at the adoption site and see how they behave when they’re comfortable in their environment.

Male VS Female Cat: A Quick Look

This chart assumes that both the male and the female cat has been spayed/neutered within a year. Going through the hormonal and maturation process can affect a cat’s behaviors greatly. This chart also assumes that the cats are going to be indoor cats.

Male VS female cat experience at a glance:

Gender CategoryMale Cat/KittenFemale Cat/Kitten
SizeLarge (11-15 lbs or 5-6.8 kg)Medium (8-10 lbs or 3.5-4.5 kg)
Affection LevelsMore cuddly & clingy.More independent & aloof.
Maintenance LevelsRequires more attention to prevent behavior issues.Requires less attention to prevent behavior issues.
Energy LevelsMedium to high (more easily bored).Low to medium (more prone to obesity).
VocalizationsMale cats tend to be more talkative.Female cats tend to be quieter.
Table 1. Male VS Female Cat: Quick Look

In short, male cats are much more involved with their owners than females. They are a bit more clingy and require more attention, playtime and tend to roughhouse. As a result, this makes them less prone to obesity but quite a bit more maintenance when compared to female cats (which means cat owners are a bit less productive and maybe get less sleep).

male and female ginger mainecoone cats.
Gender can make a big difference when owning a cat.

Female cats, on the other hand, are quite a bit more independent. They can keep themselves busy and preoccupied for longer periods of time. Also, female cats lend themselves to quieter homes because of how relaxed they are. This can be a problem itself, though, because they might require more effort to get themselves to move. Thus, managing their weight is more of a concern.

Male VS Female Cat: Detailed Comparisons of Key Traits

This chart assumes that both the male and the female cat has been spayed/neutered within a year. Going through the hormonal and maturation process can affect a cat’s behaviors. This chart also assumes that the cats are going to be indoor cats.

Detailed descriptions for key traits of male and female cats:

Gender Traits Male VS Female Cat Detailed Comparison
Playstyles (In multi-cat homes)For both genders, during their kitten stages, both will wrestle and engage in more rough behavior, but it changes a bit when the kittens become adult cats.

Adult male cats often roughhouse and wrestle (to assert dominance), and female cats like chase games. Because of their different play styles when it comes to playing with other cats, it’s recommended that you choose the same gender for a high chance of play compatibility.
Playstyles (In single-cat homes)Male cats will more likely engage in self-play. Meaning they will more easily find a toy or object and begin to play with that object by themselves.

Female cats, for the most part, won’t be interested in this type of activity. They’re much more efficient in terms of energy usage. Therefore, many female cats will only move for more engaging activities such as interactive play.
Ease of SocializationSocialization is the act of exposing your cats to certain external things (humans, other animals, other cats, environment, etc.) during the important periods in your kitten’s life.

Female kitten behaviors tend to be easier to correct than male kittens as they are generally less rambunctious.

Some especially high-energy male cats (Bengal cats especially) might require more effort and preparation in their socialization.
Learning Tricks/TrainingBoth genders will generally learn tricks quite well when they’re kittens or young cats.

However, for adult cats, since male cats are bolder – they tend to try everything and involve themselves with whatever might be new and interesting. That makes them a bit more adept at learning tricks and being leash trained. As such, they will require less time to do these things than adult female cats.
Health IssuesMost indoor cats are prone to obesity due to being inside being less stimulating than outside.

However, for female cats specifically – since they’re a little picky about how they like to play, it can be more difficult to keep them at a good weight. As a result, male cats will typically be in better shape than females.
Accepting of Other Cats/AnimalsFor the most part, female cats take longer to adapt to a new environment and new cats/animals. Again, due to the bold nature of male kittens and cats – they are more easily introduced into a multi-cat apartment and home.

To learn how to introduce cats quickly using a method that I developed, see the illustrated guide here!
Table 2. Male VS Cat: Detailed Comparisons of Key Traits
A Bengal cat about to pounce on a Russian Blue cat.
Russian Blue VS Bengal Cat. My two rowdy boys regularly wrestle with each other.

Rosie, the only female cat in my apartment, hates it when the boys try to wrestle her (or do any dominance asserting behavior). She loves being with them otherwise, but sometimes they can be a bit too rough. However, the other boys (Domestic Shorthair, Bengal, and Russian Blue) will initiate or respond to the wrestling and playfighting.

Male VS Female Cat: Recommendation For First-Time Cat Owners

This question might be more important for first-time cat owners because it’s going to be the first time having a cat in your home. You should ask what type of lifestyle you want to have with the prospective cat.

There could be many factors and cases that cat owners can consider. However, I will make some general recommendations below with a short explanation of why.

Male and female sphynx cats.
For first-time cat owners, this can be a big decision!

For example, if you’re the type to take many trips (maximum 2-3 days), then maybe a female cat would be better because they’re just a lot more independent. Here’s a checklist of what to do when you’re leaving your apartment for more than a day.

This chart assumes that both the male and the female cat has been spayed/neutered within a year. Going through the hormonal and maturation process can affect a cat’s behaviors. This chart also assumes that the cats are going to be indoor cats.

Lifestyle Recommendation: Male Cat or Female Cat
Busy Lifestyle (Demanding job, schedule, etc.)Female Cat Recommended – they tend to be greeters. They love to say hi whenever you come home and enjoy just being around you. Female cats will probably allow a better night’s rest (less likely to have the zoomies at night).
Family Lifestyle Male Cat Recommended – a home with more than one person around can give that male cat or kitten a lot of attention and playtime. They are bundles of fun, and kids love to play with active cats. Male cats also tend to be more tolerant than females (in terms of getting picked up or belly rubbed).
One Cat ApartmentFemale Cat Recommended – female cats seem to be the least likely to develop destructive habits while maintaining a good balance of independence and dependence.
Multi-Cat Apartment Either – having two boys or two girls interacting with each other is a lot of fun! Not only do they avoid having single-kitten syndrome, but the kittens end up with lower stress hormones when they grow up with another kitten! Allowing them to adapt to different situations better!
Working from HomeEither – Both genders have the same likelihood to enjoy being lap cats as you’re working on the computer or at least be around you while you do whatever it is that you’re doing.
Multi-Pet Apartment/HomeMale Recommended – male cats are just going to be bolder and more tolerant of other animals. If properly raised and socially conditioned when young, male cats can easily adapt to any animal.
Studio Apartment / Tiny HomeFemale Recommended – if you have only one pet in this type of living space, a female cat or kitten is the way to go. They are more easily socialized, and a bit less demanding than boys are.

Those that have been following this blog – know that I have been living with my 4 cats in a tiny apartment. With 3 boys and 1 girl. I am, however, not the average person. Read more here if you want to learn more about how I live with my 4 cats in an apartment!

Male VS Female Cats: Financial Costs

Did you know that there is actually a bit of difference in cost in owning either a male or a female cat?

Generally speaking, female cats will cost a bit more in their first year than male cats.

For example, one of the procedures that must be done for most domestic cats is that they will need to be neutered (males) or spayed (females). The spay will generally cost 50-100% more than the neuter as it is a more invasive process (and also requires more tests).

Expect to pay around 100USD for neuter and around 200USD for a spay. Of course, this depends on your region and who you go to but this would be the average price.

Another interesting cost consideration is about their toys. Since female cats are a bit pickier about what toys they like and how they like to play. Therefore, you might end up buying more toys and furniture and seeing what clicks with them and what doesn’t. For example, my Rosie doesn’t care for mice, balls, or lasers – she only loves interactive wand toys during a play therapy session or running on the cat wheel.

Click here for a curated list of the best toys that your cats will respond to the most!

It took me a while to figure out how she liked to play while the boys could have played with whatever was on the ground. So during the period, my wallet took a bigger hit than the boys ever did, but it was worth it because it was important to me to keep her active.


With a science background and years of experience including learning, observing, and training cats - increasing our beloved feline's welfare and wellbeing is the priority and passion.

One thought on “Male VS Female Cat/Kitten: Which Gender Should You Adopt?

  1. Sorprendente este detalle. Destacado esta sugerencia. Me hace soñar este comentario.

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